The Psychedelic Rantings of Ganesh Baba (as written down by Ira Cohen).
BEWARE OF THE NON–PSYCHEDELIC
Wise men don’t love wise men, wise men love fools. And you are such divine fools.
We are in the post-lunatic.
Anyone who does not do his duty by the mothers will be fucked by the Tantric forces.
Real saints are mad. In fact there are no saints but sinners. Real saints won’t be declared.
One will have to have an uncanny sense of humor. Abandon your languages, especially the French, Dutch and Germans.
Somebody must write a book: “Kings with Straw Mats.”
God is the supreme shopkeeper; his market is infinite.
Kriya-yoga is cosmic communion through cosmic action. Cosmic action is already going on within you.
It is all right to remain a stranger.
The beads of the rosary are inside your own body. God did this in order to impinge the inner rosary.
In Tantra, if one is a meat-eater, we give him so much meat he will ask for dal and chapati.
Reversal of reality is Maya’s job. The reversal of that reversal is the guru’s job.
You are the nearest to yourself.
Just as strong women want strong men, wicked witches desire great wizards.
Polar swingback: When you reach the highest point of positivity, you’ll swing immediately into negativity.
Our natural state is eternity.
Without fucking we are fucked up.
Materialism is morbidity.
The soul is the only censor.
We must express the dignity of poverty.
Real yogis sleep by day and fuck the night.
There is food everywhere, I tell you.
Why is the Westerner coming here to dig our dust?
People who have not felt God do not know how cool is his laugh.
Let one mystery remain.
A non-psychedelic can never enlighten a psychedelic.
I am a Naga-hipster; we don’t bother with petty formalities.
Whether they give us one blanket or two blankets, it doesn’t matter much. You see we know this body will not last.
Don’t count time if you want to evolve; if you count time you will revolve.
Ganesh Baba says he studied under Dale Carnegie: He was a great master, greater than those modern Indian phonies. He said, “Stop fucking. Start living.”
On sex: We cannot be thunderstruck by these tissues.
Buck up or fuck up.
Once a psychedelic, always a psychedelic.
Sensation should not affect you but the principle behind the sensation.
Ram is the rest point of the mind or soul, not the man with bow and arrow.
What Marx called synthesis, Christ called God.
No sucking in our ashram.
If you have to pay five rupees to see Rajneesh, then you have to pay five rupees to see my doodoo.
I look upon you successively as a skeleton, then as a complementary circuit.
The history of India is a continuous stream of high hoax.
Beware of India. This is my last comment.
Another comment: India is OK. Beware of Indians.
The first lesson from India you can learn: We will all die.
I have died four or five times and I am still alive and kicking.
Don’t cut the vegetables. Make them whole.
We will always fuck the mothers of the spiritual, three orgasms an hour, the older the better.
A fool laughs three times. The first time when others are laughing. The second time when they understand the joke. The third time when they wonder why they laughed when they didn’t understand the joke.
Ganesh Baba on himself: He is not only the goofy Himalayan psychedelic yoga teacher but he was a student under Einstein, Schrodinger, Jung, Max Planck, not second or third hand but hot hand, asker of the most insidious questions under the sun. Only by asking silliest questions can you get wisest answers.
Ganesh Baba’s guru said to Ganesh: “Sit with your back straight until you drop dead. Then you will be be sitting in my lap and I will be sitting in the lap of God.” I believe him and I am still going that way.
Ganesh Baba says: All faiths pretend syruptitious information is divine knowledge.
There is no playboy, only dull-boy, I tell you. It is a quarter past twelve by my Playboy watch.
For the true psychedelic the nuptial bed becomes the surgical table.
Dharma can fuck everybody. If Dharma can’t fuck there will be only goody-goodies.
Life is like a fruit. Any place it finds a gradient, that way it will go.
Fuck two hundred western women and nothing will happen. Fuck one Indian woman and she will suck you through and through. Beware of Indian women. One fuck will affect your grandmother in heaven.
Bhaktivedanta used to come and take bhang with me secretly. Now he wants to fuck the psychedelics.
I once had eighteen posh theatres, then I went to one of the theatres and I thought it was the bathroom.
On the Nagas: We are the oldest monks in the world. No one can compare with us in our phoniness. We will outshout you all the time. We are not ordinary monks but hipster monks.
Suggested prayer for Ganeshian Aspirants: Dear God, if there is a God, please help me, if you can help me.
Ganesh is Gnosis.
In our camp food is given only when starving. Then when you are fed, you are fed up.
Ask your guru. He reads the paper between the lines. (Read this at least twice before laughing. — I.C.)
I want to love people at a distance.
A man who does not know grammar cannot know God who is the most refined principle.
The underbeard is a huge Ganeshian joke.
Let philosophies flourish or be demolished.
We wizards want witches to fuck.
The most powerful speaker, if he is not boring, is no speaker, I tell you. A very sweet boring to the centre.
The body will die, the personal psyche will die, the cosmic psyche will die, but the cosmic spirit will never die.
We are sun worshippers; we live the simple life. Look, we have just one light and yet see these exhibition halls!
Live it light. Only a touch. It is all in here.
Ganeshian Psychedelic Message: Yankee, stop your hanky-panky. Don’t be so swanky.
I want to forsake myself before the true image and to fuck the mother of the devil if need be.
For simple men God is spirit.
Ganesh Baba says he blew Winston Churchill’s mind with slick english on horseback.
Bring my saffron-robe. Today I will match my colour with everybody. (From Tagore)
In Indian poetry you don’t have to ask who wrote the poem, it comes in a line.
I don’t care what a man does or does not do, as long as he does well.
Remind me to tell you about extra-cerebral nostalgia.
As a wizard I have beaten your witch out. As a Baba I love you.
You are only mad. He is madder. I am maddest.
OM is Home.
Hello, i’m Lizzo’s boyfrann & I like to get funkin phreakkkkay
Strike another match and start a-new;
What is a flotation tank?
500 kg of Epsom salts are added to 1000 litres of water, creating a 30 cm deep solution, which is heated to 35.5 degrees C (skin temperature).
The temperature of the water means that once you are settled in the tank, it is virtually impossible to distinguish between parts of the body that are in contact with the water, and those that aren’t, in effect “fooling” the brain into believing that the person is floating in mid-air.
That would be amazing.